Phone Chat Tip #15 – Spark Attraction

When you hear the word “attraction” what do you think of? The first thing that comes to mind is probably sex. You’re not alone there. Most of us equate attraction with sexual desire, with how a person looks, and how it would feel to touch them. Attraction is important for good sex, no doubt about it, but there’s a lot more to attraction than just the physical.

When you hear the word “attraction” what do you think of? The first thing that comes to mind is probably sex. You’re not alone there. Most of us equate attraction with sexual desire, with how a person looks, and how it would feel to touch them. Attraction is important for good sex, no doubt about it, but there’s a lot more to attraction than just the physical.

What does the word mean anyway? The dictionary defines attraction like this, “The action or power of evoking interest, pleasure, or liking for someone or something.” Pleasure is a part of it, but attraction is also about interest and compatibility. Being attracted to someone is about liking them!

So, how do you figure out (a) whether you are attracted to someone, and (b) how to grow that attraction? By asking the right questions.

Here are five questions that will spark immediate attraction, if you are chatting with the right person:

What gets you going or what are you passionate about?
Passion and attraction go hand in hand. It’s hot when someone is really into something — and yes, we’re still talking about more than just sex! Knowing what gets your conversational partner going will help you figure out whether you are a good match. If you get excited by the same things, well what could be more attractive than that?

What kind of things do you like to do?
Like the first question, but a little more general, asking about someone’s hobbies or interests will help you find common ground. Like we mentioned, attraction is also about compatibility, so figuring out if you like the same things can help build a good foundation for a relationship. Plus, you’ll have a lot more to talk about if you have things in common!

What’s something embarrassing that you’ve never told anyone before?
This one can really heat things up. Usually, asking a question like this will lead to a sexual revelation that can excite you both. Or, it could lead to a funny story that you can both laugh over. Either way, laughter and fantasies are good for building attraction. This kind of question is best saved for when you’re a little farther down the conversational road, once you’ve gotten comfortable with each other.

How do you express love?
This one digs deep folks! It’s a good question to ask once you’ve figured out whether you are basically compatible and want to know more. We all express love in different ways and have different needs when it comes to receiving it. If you’re the type of person that needs a lot of lovin’, it’s best to know right away whether your partner likes to give it!

Where is the wildest place you’ve had sex?
If you want to kick things up a notch, definitely ask this question. You might be surprised by the answer! At the very least, you’ll share a good laugh. And talking about sex is a great way to figure out whether you want to have sex — who would’ve guessed?

Feel ready to get hot and heavy with it? Or maybe just share a laugh?

Practice these attraction-building questions with the singles on Livelinks Chatline today!

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